Saturday, March 7, 2009

EXTRA! EXTRA! News Reporter Mom

Wow….I’ve been M-I-A as far as posting about my hats.

Last week, our family dog, Fina was ill. We have had her for 6 years and she is an important member of our family.

We took her to the Vet on a Thursday afternoon. They ran a bunch of tests and sent us on our way. The following Friday night (of course as the kids and the household were closing down for the night) the vet called with the news. Our beautiful dog Fina was diabetic and having complications.

Then, I had to break the news to the girls. It was a long night after that.

The rest of the evening was filled with mad internet searches about canine diabetes and treatment, comforting broken hearts, and the life changes it would mean to all of us, if she was treatable. It also included what would happen if she was not treatable.

As moms, we are generally the bearers of much of the news that needs to be distributed to our families. Whether it is good news or bad news, news of a fun event or even the death of a pet, friend, or loved one, we moms have to find the right words to deliver the news. Even if we don’t deliver the initial message, we have to deal with the emotional ramifications and have to find a way to manage what has transpired.

This is not an easy Job!

We have to find the right words to actually convey the message, but, at the same time, filter our words so that they will be heard and understood by our children - with the least amount of pain. To add to the intricacies of this type of communicating is the fact that each one of our children are different, respond differently to situations, react differently to stress, grief, and conflict, and generally process things differently from one another. Not to mention, we have to manage our own feelings about the news.

There is no sugar coating the donning of this hat. It is not easy one to wear when the news is bad. However, just as with every other hat we wear, it is necessary to complete our wardrobes as moms.

The only advice I can give is when it is time to take this one out of the hatbox is to know your children, be honest with them, but also be aware of the words you are using. If you do, you will wear it effectively until it is time to put it back in its box.

P.S. We are treating Fina’s diabetes and she will hopefully have many more happy years with us.


  1. So glad to hear that Fina's diabetes is manageable. Yes, that particular hat is a very difficult one to wear, requiring a delicate balancing act between truth and gentleness. Well done.

  2. Too many families lie to their children to protect them. As an experienced educator I can guarantee that the families that lied to "protect" their children tend not to have good relationships with them when they get older. I am so glad that you, and many of us moms, take the time and the pain necessary to help our children process the bad as well as the good. It is what makes them whole, healthy adults!

  3. Bon tardi!

    Truth has a way of bringing people together. Your family came together as a unit and I'm certain each felt comfortable to ask questions. Doing Research together was a wonderful way for everyone to learn about Fina's condition.

    I'm thrilled that Fina will be okay. Your kids will be more aware of her now more than ever.

    Thanks for the add on Twitter. I look forward to more of you...and your blog posts!



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